Here is my annual critical ranking of the Super Bowl commercials. This is the pregame edition, with all the available national ads that I could track down; the list will be updated after Sunday’s game.
The trends so far? Nothing controversial, as you would expect, but also — and perhaps for associated reasons — very little creativity. It’s a bad year for ads; the ones at the top of this list aren’t much better than average. More spots than usual depend entirely on the appeal of a relatable celebrity (who is almost certainly male). Concepts beat ideas — there is a lot of fussy, overly complicated silliness and not much in the way of simple, effective storytelling or mood setting.
(You may not see every commercial listed here during the game, and you may see commercials not listed here. The various broadcast and streaming platforms will carry different selections of ads, and some ads will only be shown in certain regions.)
The N.F.L.’s own feel-good promo, “Somebody,” is affecting in a highly produced, can’t-we-all-just-get-along manner. Its implicit endorsement of diversity and inclusion offers a muted contrast to the league’s decision to forgo the “End Racism” end-zone slogan.
No. 2
Stella Artois
David Beckham learns he has a secret twin, who turns out to look a lot like Matt Damon. Reasonably charming, and Ben Affleck jokes never get old.
No. 3
Squarespace
The actor Barry Keoghan rides a donkey around ye olde rural Ireland (he’s back in the world of “The Banshees of Inisherin”), delivering customers’ websites by throwing laptops into farmyards and through pub windows. It’s cute, even though it’s designed to ensure that Keoghan yells “Squarespace!” every few seconds.
Scheduled for the pregame show, the coffee maker’s stylish “Hello Again” ad seeks to remind us why we once loved Starbucks. And it kind of does!
No. 5
The Foundation to Combat Antisemitism
Snoop Dogg and Tom Brady trade insults for 15 seconds, spitting out generic reasons for hating each other. Their celebrity is a distraction from the message about tolerance, but when Snoop, now himself, says, “I hate that things are so bad that we have to do a commercial about it,” it still hits home.
No. 6
HexClad
Gordon Ramsay is recruited to cook for a visiting extraterrestrial played by Pete Davidson. The scenario is clever, though the Ramsay-to-Davidson ratio is exactly the opposite of what you would want.
Those noted grumps Aubrey Plaza and Michael Shannon show off their saltiness, because Ritz crackers are salty. (Bad Bunny drops by, for the sake of variety.) It’s more intelligible than most of the one-joke ads, and Plaza and Shannon are a good pair.
No. 8
Science Moms
The likely progress of climate change is charted along the timeline of a newborn girl’s life. A little clunky and sanctimonious in its execution but unimpeachable in its sentiments.
No. 9
The national ad for Google’s Gemini personal assistant is likely to be the most slickly handsome production in the field. If the use of Capra-esque family moments to humanize an A.I.-generated voice that coaches a dad for a job interview completely creeps you out, however, feel free to move this to the bottom of the list.
Dylan Bradshaw and Nate Norell, the winners of a $1 million contest, created an ad with something most of the agencies don’t seem interested in: a story. It’s nebulous — an alien tries very hard to wrestle a bag of Doritos away from its human owner — but it’s there.
No. 11
On
Roger Federer and Elmo debate the spelling of the logo on Federer’s shoes. There’s barely even a coherent thought here, but come on, it’s Roger Federer and Elmo.
No. 12
STōK
Channing Tatum teaches the actual players of the Wrexham soccer club in Wales — subject of the series “Welcome to Wrexham” — how to do celebration dances. It’s always fun to watch Tatum move, though on the evidence of this and any number of movies, there is no one left on earth who knows how to film someone dancing.
Catherine O’Hara and Willem Dafoe as pickleball hustlers playing for beer is a nice idea, though it goes on for too long.
No. 14
Nerds
Shaboozey, riding the wave from “A Bar Song” and his guest appearances on “Cowboy Carter,” sings “What a Wonderful World” backed by a gigantic, red, trumpet-playing gummy in a slight but pleasant and colorful spot.
No. 15
DoorDash
The presence of the always engaging comedian Nate Bargatze elevates this otherwise indifferent (but frenetic) spot, in which he uses the money he saves on deliveries to clone himself.
Antonio Banderas is totally in on the joke, and he’s fun to watch as he’s transformed by the glory of his Bosch refrigerator. The appliance and tool company loses points, however, for the odd decision to pair Banderas with an actor playing the wrestler Randy Savage, who died in 2011.
No. 17
Häagen-Dazs
Vin Diesel and Michelle Rodriguez, in a cool car on a coastal highway, slow down to enjoy ice cream bars to the sweet sound of Smokey Robinson’s “Cruisin’.” The play on their “Fast and Furious” personas is negligible but nice to look at.
No. 18
Budweiser
Will the young men who drive beer sales respond to the soft, nostalgic pull of a Clydesdale nosing a keg across the countryside to the sound of the Bellamy Brothers? It’s a sobering thought. The horse is awfully cute, though.
Issa Rae’s indestructible likability graces a series of mild sight gags about the irritations of tax season.
No. 20
Ram Trucks
A fairy tale is remade as a comic blockbuster, with the ubiquitous Glen Powell — whose anodyne charm is apparently perfect for the current moment — in the role of Goldilocks and pickup trucks taking the place of porridge.
No. 21
Skechers
Andy Reid, who will be on the sideline as coach of the Kansas City Chiefs, is a more natural pitchman than you might expect. He also seems to be aware that the ad, in which he’s cast as a part-time hand model in order to sell slip-on shoes, makes no sense at all.
To the sound of “Born to Be Wild,” four women of grandmotherly age pile into a convertible and partake in strenuous and mildly racy antics. It all feels a little out of proportion to what’s being sold, which are floor mats.
No. 23
Pepsi
The soft-drink brand revives the Pepsi Challenge, pitting zero-sugar colas against one another, with a resolutely utilitarian announcement that has the nice touch of focusing on (what looks like) a 50-year-old TV set.
No. 24
Coors Light
Human-sized sloths move, very slowly, through their routines at the office, the gym and other places on the Monday after the Super Bowl. That a case of Coors Light is the appropriate accompaniment for their dazed state seems like a mixed message at best.
Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal reunite at Katz’s so that she can fake another orgasm, this time inspired by mayonnaise. Crystal’s reactions are seamless, but the punchline doesn’t deliver.
No. 26
NerdWallet
A high-I.Q. beluga whale with Kieran Culkin’s voice retrieves a klutzy human’s cellphone. The message appears to be that we are a hapless race wholly dependent on the internet, and who can argue?
No. 27
Meta
A Chris, a Chris and a Kris (Hemsworth, Pratt and Jenner) plug the tech giant’s A.I.-assisted Ray-Ban sunglasses. This pair of intermittently amusing spots sends the reassuring message that contemporary art is just there to be made fun of, with all the wit and grace you would expect from a tech giant.
A young farm girl, left behind when everyone else heads to the field, plants and tends an equally forlorn potato. The aw factor is very high; the sudden pivot at the end into a public service announcement for family farms is jarring.
No. 29
Uber Eats
One of two overthought ads featuring Matthew McConaughey (see also Salesforce, below). The cameos by Kevin Bacon, Greta Gerwig and Martha Stewart are nice, but is this the best time to be making jokes about conspiracy theories?
No. 30
Salesforce
McConaughey and Woody Harrelson are the attractions in a forced and laugh-free scenario involving outdoor restaurant seating and heavy rain. The product is apparently an artificial intelligence that will book restaurant tables more intelligently than other A.I.s can.
The much-loved actor Walton Goggins, at the risk of making himself slightly less loved, shills for GoDaddy’s business-creation tool Airo in an overly busy spot that ends up being a plug for his own Walton Goggins Goggle Glasses as well.
No. 32
Dove
This public-service spot from the seller of soaps and other personal-care items shows an adorable 3-year-old girl running down a sidewalk, then puts up a title saying that when she’s 14 she will hate her legs. The message about positive body images never quite comes through.
No. 33
Instacart
Grocery delivery as a stampede, with familiar brand mascots — a doughboy chef, a green giant, a grinning pitcher — racing across the landscape to arrive together on a homeowner’s doorstep. Seems like a recipe for breakage.
If you’re not aware that the face on the Pringles logo has a mustache, then this high-concept spot — with its flying celebrity mustaches winging their way to the store to get more chips — will be more than a little bewildering.
No. 35
Bud Light
The comedian Shane Gillis and the rapper Post Malone star in a deadpan ode to suburban backyard partying, with cultural undertones and overtones that defy simple analysis. Peyton Manning drops by to lend folksy gravitas.
No. 36
Booking.com
The reservation service promotes its “something for everyone” promise with a scattered montage of hotel mishaps that isn’t likely to appeal to anyone in particular. Various Muppets make cameo appearances.
An animated seal with the face and voice of, yes, Seal sings a parody of the 1994 hit “Kiss From a Rose.” It may induce nightmares, though you have to admit that “My flippers can’t hold Mountain Dew, what a shame” makes about as much sense as “And now that your rose is in bloom, a light hits the gloom on the gray.”
No. 38
Disney+
Imagining the world without “Star Wars” or “The Simpsons” or “The Bear,” this bland spot for Disney’s streaming offerings might make you think, “Yeah, that wouldn’t be so bad.”
No. 39
Cirkul
Adam DeVine of the “Pitch Perfect” movies accidentally orders 100,000 Cirkul water bottles, a gag that ties into an actual giveaway said to be taking place during the Super Bowl. It’s hard to say which is more annoying: the ad or the notion of spending money on branded water bottles.
Confused lovers of the company’s “chocolate lava” candy try to eat actual lava. It’s a head-scratcher.
No. 41
Totino’s Pizza Rolls
Would you base your campaign for frozen pizza snacks on an animated alien who looks like the walking personification of heartburn?
No. 42
Hims & Hers
The telehealth company’s plug for its weight-loss services takes the form of a jangly attack on big pharma and corporate medicine. Confusing, unsettling and unconvincing.